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    It's important to recognise that everyone's body is different, and pleasure should always be your first goal rather than performance or ticking boxes.

    If you're keen to persevere, head over to our squirting tips , where sex educator Lola Jean explains how to ride the waves of female ejaculation.

    The first big step to ensuring more women have the confidence to unlock their squirting potential or share it with a partner, is to combat sexual stigma and demystify the topic.

    One of the best ways to improve education around all kinds of orgasm is to talk about it. And it also misses out the fact that there are many ways to have sex that don't involve a penis or penetration at all.

    Parenting Mental health Healthy eating Conditions Follow. Type keyword s to search. Vladimir Serov Getty Images. Ejaculation versus squirting According to French gynaecologist and sex researcher Dr Samuel Salama, it's important to understand the difference between female ejaculation and squirting.

    Related Story. You may be able to find the same content in another format, or you may be able to find more information, at their web site.

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    Phil says it takes a woman 14 minutes to have an orgasm… well I feel bad for Dr. Well, one thing is for sure… unless you have delayed ejaculation, a woman generally does take longer to orgasm than men do.

    My experience with the female orgasm was not always good… in fact it was terrible — trauma-causing terrible. I had the love of my life leave me due to my inability to satisfy her in bed.

    The female orgasm was a mystery to me. Something I thought was reserved for stronger, higher-level men in the food chain, from a Darwinistic point of view.

    After that girl left me, it became my life mission to be able to make a woman orgasm. Or die trying. Any free time I had, I obsessively researched on the female orgasm… oral sex tactics, books on the clitoris, sex forums, guides to different penetrative techniques.

    When I finally had a chance that was too good to pass up and felt I was ready, I went down on her and penetrated her to TWO powerful orgasms in under 10 minutes.

    But I have concerned it was a fluke. I repeated this with the same girl several times, but worried if I would be able to repeat the results with other women… but I did.

    Scientists put her in an MRI like a machine, studying her brain waves, and they were, in fact, identical to the overwhelming hurricane of brain activity that occurs during orgasm.

    She was having an orgasm just from thought. These muscles wrap around the pelvis, and have been associated with increased chances of reaching orgasm, stronger orgasms, and squirting.

    Cut off your flow before your bladder is empty. Repeat that 30 times daily. The type of stimulation you need to squirt often creates a sensation of having to urinate.

    If the need to urinate ever feels overwhelming, you can just go ahead and let it rip without having to worry about making a mess.

    Your next step is to find your G-spot. The G-spot is located just a few inches from the vaginal wall. You can use your fingers to locate it.

    If you press down on it, you should feel like you have to pee. The Njoy Pure Wand is my hands-down favorite recommendation.

    The G-spot is more about pressure than on doing a ton of tricky movements, so try simply rubbing the toy in small circles with a good amount of force.

    Your partner should be in a position that gives them good leverage and is comfortable. Alternatively, they can use a toy on you.

    Again, focus on small, tight movements with a lot of pressure. You want to give yourself about minutes to reach orgasm. Remember, feeling the urge to pee is normal.

    You can always get up to use the restroom for some peace of mind, or be unabashed about trying to let go!

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    Alternatively, they can use a toy on you. Again, focus on small, tight movements with a lot of pressure. You want to give yourself about minutes to reach orgasm.

    Remember, feeling the urge to pee is normal. You can always get up to use the restroom for some peace of mind, or be unabashed about trying to let go!

    If you feel yourself starting to near orgasm, focus on pushing down on your PC muscles, releasing, and repeating.

    Bearing down is important because it will help the fluid actually release from the urethra. It sounds cliche, but try to relax and enjoy yourself, regardless of what happens!

    Squirting has become a new and fetishized sexual benchmark for a lot of people. You have to be relaxed in order to release. Focus on the pleasure, ladies!

    There are far too many people out there who want to make their partners squirt simply because of their own egos. All together now: focus on the pleasure!

    This post originally stated that urine is sterile, and was updated to reflect that it is indeed not. Vanessa Marin is a licensed psychotherapist specializing in sex therapy.

    Have questions about sex? You can reach her at vanessa. Lifehacker: After Hours is a new blog aiming to improve your sex life.

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    Vanessa Marin. Filed to: sex. Open kinja-labs. Being able to make them squirt, I imagined, would be almost as rewarding for me as it would be for them.

    Over the next several years, more of my non-squirting partners mentioned that they'd like to try it. A few left a giant puddle on the bed during intercourse but not because they were trying to.

    When I tried to make it rain intentionally with my fingers, the only results were frustration and muscle cramps. That's why I had low expectations when my girlfriend and I were invited to attend a seminar where sex coach Kenneth Play would give a minute presentation on female ejaculation, demonstrate how to make it happen with his assistant, and then coach attendees as they went about doing it themselves.

    Long story short, my girlfriend intentionally ejaculated for the first, second, and third time that evening, and so did virtually every woman in the room.

    First, you both need to set your intention have a sincere and authentic desire to explore this phenomenon.

    A practical part of setting the intention is preparing the space for what might happen. During the workshop, all of the couples were given puppy pads so that everyone could feel good about letting go.

    Staying hydrated is key, says Play, though he recommends that prospective squirters pee before getting things underway.

    As with all sexual acts, front loading with foreplay and arousal is going to pay off big down the line.

    Play recommends taking your time to kiss, stimulate the clitoris for a sufficient amount of time. Often called the female prostate, these glands are located on the anterior wall of the vagina, around the lower end of the urethra.

    During his presentation, Play explained to the class that squirting requires a little reconditioning. Aside from not clenching, Play says to insert a finger into their vagina and have them cycle through three states: squeezing it, relaxing around it, and then trying to push your finger out.

    Once sufficiently aroused, Play recommends inserting your middle and ring fingers into the vaginal opening, your index and pinky fingers on the outer labia with the heel of your hand flush against the clitoral area.

    At this point, the flood gates opened for a couple of attendees at the PlayLab, but many of the facilitators—me included—were seriously starting to flag.

    Turns out, there are two sex toys that, when used in conjunction, make eliciting female ejaculation much more comfortable: the Original Magic Wand and the NJoy Pure Wand.

    The former provides ample clitoral stimulation while the latter is especially good at offering consistent stimulation of the g-spot area.

    He calls the result a "blended, squirting orgasm. Aftercare in the aftermath of ejaculation is very important. Play recommends holding your partner, letting them have their process as they return to baseline.

    My girlfriend at the time, and every partner I've helped to squirt since, enjoyed their first experience of squirting. But interestingly, only a few actually requested it regularly.

    1 Comments

    • Mikajinn

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